The ‘ Right Now attitude. ‘


#How madly do you want it?

Every good thing in life is worth commitment, sacrifices and most importantly perseverance and persistence.

Perseverance and persistence; They not niceties in this case, they are rather a necessity. They are equally important as the accomplishment of your goal is to you. Everyone can start but it takes one who perseveres and persistent to continue and have the results they want. 

*perseverance is the quality that allow someone to continue (persist) when things get difficult.


*Persistence is the act of constantly refusing to give up or letting go.

We get so obsessed with the desire of getting everything in a snap of a finger. We want everything ‘ right now .’ When things get tough we opt for the easy way out; giving up.

I always think that the difference between the successful and failure is brought about by the ability to persevere and persist.

The successful maximise on the two. Failures instead, give up and go for what’s is easier to do.

#There is actually a very fine line between success and failure. We mostly throw in the towel when we are almost there.

Time is always a factor.

No success comes overnight.

When things seem not to be going on well as planned, you just need to give them time. Time is the remedy.

The ability to persevere and persist is the focal point of every success story.

The ‘ right now attitude’ only brings disappointments.

If it’s something you want so badly, you need to get rid of this attitude.



It’s worth time-giving.

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Why you need to make new families wherever you go.

I was reading a post by Ajibola this morning and I was so impressed. Follow him-Benefits of Social Support – http://wp.me/p7E7bD-on . His posts are incredibly awesome. You can be sure of benefiting a lot from him.
This just part of his post, a quote ;

Our need for social support isn’t just in our heads. Evolutionary psychologists explain that the innate need to affiliate and form social bonds has been literally wired into our biology. When we make a positive social connection, the pleasure-inducing hormone oxytocin is released into our bloodstream, immediately reducing anxiety and improving concentration and focus. Each social connection also bolsters our cardiovascular, neuroendocrine, and immune systems, so that the more connections we make over time, the better we function.– Shawn Achor

​LIVING THE UNLIVED LIFE WITHIN US.

Who are you?
What makes you ‘you’ and not so-and-so?

If your life were a book then what would have been its themes?

In life sometimes, we tend to join the lowest denominator without our knowledge. We happen to abandon our own lives and start living other people’s lives.

It’s our unawareness of who we are, our true selves that puts us in such situations.

(*the need for understanding)When you begin to understand yourself you develop insights on what it means to be alive or living-dead, you become able to distinguish between the two. The knowledge of one’s self is the knowledge of life. When you know yourself you start living the unlived life within you, the virgin life.

The journey to understanding ourselves is one that has no end and therefore no defined destination. As some people will put it, life is beyond words. It has no particular definition. The definition changes every day with the circumstances we are constantly bombarded with. 

This therefore calls for a lot of understanding. We need to spend much time exploring ourselves; how we interact with others, our emotions and how we respond to different challenges.

(*Challenges)The hard-knocks of life are the indicators of where we need to grow. Every hard-knock the world pushes our way is like a bell being rang in our heads to wake us up from our deep sleep. We fail to learn when we start blaming others for the situations we are going through. We give our powers away by not taking it as our responsibility to understand why we are going through that situation. And the truth is that we are the co-authors of our own situations.

By investing our time to understand ourselves better we gain the know-how of who we are, the real us and what we destined for. We gain the knowledge on how to handle different situations in our own lives that might befall us in our tomorrow.

We become problem solvers.

We gain the authenticity. An original image of ourselves will come out; it will become evident to the world automatically.

We become autonomous. We gain self- mastery. We become supreme, invincible and indestructible.

I do this every day in my life, when I’m with friends, my family, when alone and it has really proved fruitful.

Find the true meaning of your life by knowing yourself better.

©The Archetype

The Art of Listening.


Listening is such a prerequisite attribute in life yet so much neglected. 
The dying need for listening cuts across diplomacy, business, school, leadership and life in general.

Any leader who misses this important quality is much considered a tyrant; a dictator.

Listening is something to do with ‘being short in the mouth and long in the ears’. It involves doing much of the listening and less of the talking.

You are always in a position to learn whenever you give others undivided attention when they’re talking regardless of their age, their outlook, their backgrounds and among other factors that can make it seem inappropriate to listen to them. Listening has to do with doing away with our prejudgments about others. 

It should be noted that we all learned our mother tongue through listening and that we also learn new languages through a lot of listening.

Yet something important. Listening also applies when you are with yourself. We all need those quiet moments with ourselves, lock up ourselves in a room or go to some relaxed place where there are no destructions, and listen to our souls(* others will say God). This is the source of the many creative ideas, the innovations and inventions across our industrialized world.

Meditation also involves a lot of listening. One seeks a quiet environment to listen to their soul.

There is actually a lot to benefit by just listening.

Next time when you go out there, interact with people, listen to them, and don’t forget to schedule time to listen to yourself too, you will be amazed by how it’s magic works.

©The Archetype

Loneliness.


OF BEING ALONE AND LONELINESS.
I can feel it in the interlocked hands of couples, with one person holding on so tight that the other doesn’t even have to try. I can feel it in the gaze of a man or woman who looks longingly past their partner to the person on the other side. I can feel it in the couples chasing perfection as they laugh together, but leave when the sadness begins.

I can hear it in the clinking of ice cubes that swirl around dark temptations as thirsty lips drink, until they forget whom they belong to. I can hear it as people move, drowning in a sea of bodies, in a silence so loud that the beating music just isn’t enough. I can hear it in the empty laughter of late nights, as young girls and boys rush past shining street signs to homes of people who will turn into strangers in the morning.
I can see it lurking behind glossy screens trying so hard to be anything but what they really are. I can see it behind frantic fingers that double tap on things that inspire envy, and hover over ghosts of people they are still in love with. I can see it in eyes that cannot sleep and cannot cry, because they are afraid that if they start they will never stop.
I can feel it in the closing walls of cubicles that don’t let the sunshine in. I can feel it in the loud, incessant talking at cafes that have nothing really important to say. I can feel it in flashiness of superficial and materialistic things that will be forgotten, when something shinier comes along.
I can sense it in silence on the dining table of a large family whose mouths are only for eating. I can sense it in the man who sits alone on the park bench, watching his life flash past his eyes. I can sense it in the wrinkled-ness of old age that yearns for the freshness of youth.
I used to think that there was nothing worse than death, but it seems as if we fear our *loneliness* much more than dying. *We are willing to be eaten alive, and to be killed by our loneliness before we have learned to live*. Anything is better than facing the rough edged rawness of our real selves, even the apparent threat of death. *I used to think that loneliness was something that could be overcome and conquered. I used to think that it was something to run away far, far away from, into a land of completeness.*That is,what I used to think.
*I used to think that there was something missing,* until it struck me that loneliness could never be filled.I was wrong.
It is there after you have loved somebody, and have lost them. It is there after you have loved somebody, and still love them. It is there after you have discovered the light, beautiful, creative, divine parts of yourself. It is there after you’ve learned to love the ugly, authentic, dark and terrible parts of yourself. It is there while you are travelling the world, and meeting new faces. It is there while you are home with your family and familiar things.It is there.
It is there, always there, waiting patiently for you to come back to it.
It is there until you recognize that what you were running from was never chasing after you. It is there until you understand that you can choose to fill it with anything you want, your darkest fears and wildest desires. It is there until you stop escaping from it, and start escaping to the taste of freedom. It is there until you realize that the vastness of its space is as big as the universe. It is there until you realize that your loneliness is an ocean of nothingness, and then it simply ceases to exist.
*It is gone when you listen to the silence of your soul speaking to you, and in that moment you know that you were always alone but never lonely.*

©The Indomitable

The law of life.

“There’s a powerful story about a little boy walking along the bank of a river. He sees a crocodile who is trapped in a net. The crocodile says, “Would you have pity on me and release me? I may look ugly, but it isn’t my fault, you know. I was made this way. But whatever my external appearance, I have a mother’s heart. I came this morning in search of food for my young ones and got caught in this trap!” So the boy says, “Ah, if I were to help you out of that trap, you’d grab me and kill me.” The crocodile asks, “Do you think I would do that to my benefactor and liberator?” So the boy is persuaded to take the net off and the crocodile grabs him. As he is being forced between the jaws of the crocodile, he says, “So this is what I get for my good actions.” And the crocodile says, “Well, don’t take it personally, son, this is the way the world is, this is the law of life.” The boy disputes this, so the crocodile says, “Do you want to ask someone if it isn’t so?” The boys sees a bird sitting on a branch and says, “Bird, is what the crocodile says right?” The bird says, “The crocodile is right. Look at me. I was coming home one day with food for my fledglings. Imagine my horror to see a snake crawling up the tree, making straight for my nest. I was totally helpless. It kept devouring my young ones, one after the other. I kept screaming and shouting, but it was useless. The crocodile is right, this is the law of life, this is the way the world is.” “See,” says the crocodile. But the boy says, “Let me ask someone else.” So the crocodile says, “Well, all right, go ahead.” There was an old donkey passing by on the bank of the river. “Donkey,” says the boy, “this is what the crocodile says. Is the crocodile right?” The donkey says, “The crocodile is quite right. Look at me. I’ve worked and slaved for my master all my life and he barely gave me enough to eat. Now that I’m old and useless, he has turned me loose, and here I am wandering in the jungle, waiting for some wild beast to pounce on me and put an end to my life. The crocodile is right, this is the law of life, this is the way the world is.” “See,” says the crocodile. “Let’s go!” The boy says, “Give me one more chance, one last chance. Let me ask one other being. Remember how good I was to you?” So the crocodile says, “All right, your last chance.” The boy sees a rabbit passing by, and he says, “Rabbit, is the crocodile right?” The rabbit sits on his haunches and says to the crocodile, “Did you say that to that boy? The crocodile says, Yes, I did.” “Wait a minute,” says the rabbit. “We’ve got to discuss this.” “Yes,” says the crocodile. But the rabbit says, “How can we discuss it when you’ve got that boy in your mouth? Release him; he’s got to take part in the discussion, too.” The crocodile says, “You’re a clever one, you are. The moment I release him, he’ll run away.” The rabbit says, “I thought you had more sense than that. If he attempted to run away, one slash of your tail would kill him.” “Fair enough,” says the crocodile, and he released the boy. The moment the boy is released, the rabbit says, “Run!” And the boy runs and escapes. Then the rabbit says to the boy, “Don’t you enjoy crocodile flesh? Wouldn’t the people in your village like a good meal? You didn’t really release that crocodile; most of his body is still caught in that net. Why don’t you go to the village and bring everybody and have a banquet.” That’s exactly what the boy does. He goes to the village and calls all the menfolk. They come with their axes and staves and spears and kill the crocodile. The boy’s dog comes, too, and when the dog sees the rabbit, he gives chase, catches hold of the rabbit, and throttles him. The boy comes on the scene too late, and as he watches the rabbit die, he says, “The crocodile was right, this is the way the world is, this is the law of life.”
There is no explanation you can give that would explain away all the sufferings and evil and torture and destruction and hunger in the world! You’ll never explain it. You can try gamely with your formulas, religious and otherwise, but you’ll never explain it. Because life is a mystery, which means your thinking mind cannot make sense out of it. For that you’ve got to wake up and then you’ll suddenly realize that reality is not problematic, you are the problem.

(adapted from Awareness by Anthony de Mello]

©The Archetype

pursuit of perfection?

As human beings we have this ideology strongly wired in our brains, that we have to be perfect. We tend to live our lives pursuing perfectionism, but no one has ever made it to be perfect. 
The pursuit of perfection I always view it as an illusion. The same a donkey is illusioned with a carrot placed right before its mouth is the same case with perfection. 

Wanting to be perfect is the surest way to sadness.

Making mistakes is human and getting mad with ourselves whenever we make mistakes is like being mad because we are human. That’s being hostile and inhuman to yourself.

We are meant to commit mistakes.

You can be sure that the person you are today is as a result of all the mistakes you have been making in your entire life. We are largely influenced by the mistakes we commit. 

Mistakes are not only proof that you are tying but also signs for success. Once you realize your mistakes and learn from them you move even more closer to where you would like to be.

 Once you get mad because of your mistakes you never make any effort to learn, you start seeking to be perfect. 

Sometimes we tend to run from our past. We tend to develop a polarity to our past. we constantly say to ourselves, “Ignore you past. Don’t focus on your past instead focus on your future”.

I never forsake my past. I learn from it.

I happen to have a list of some of my biggest mistakes and I constantly go through it. I never run from them.

It’s all about understanding your mistakes.

And whenever I make mistakes I don’t go to the “thinking corner” of my bed. Instead, I remind myself that I don’t have to be perfect and I was never meant to be one. I focus on understanding myself each time, everyday.

©The Archetype